The Diary of a single man.

I wake up with a smile of the rich of lucky person. My smile becomes wider from the anticipation of new feelings granted by new acquaintance! The look of her languid, black as night eyes, with interest directed on me adds the importance of my stormy life.

What happiness that I have found forces to break up with another one! During the last meetings with her the hidden irritation always increased in me! It is awful when the person isn’t pleasant to you with everything: both with talking and actions! And instead of her boring physiognomy there appearing a mysterious face of the new acquaintance promising scale of new feelings!

I don’t see her and I don’t hear her cooing voice and suddenly resolutely I stop this trite, prolonged dream with the statement for a rupture of our relations. Without expecting the answer, I turn and leave quickly! Well done! I should put an end to it long ago! How many times can I lie to myself and others?



The Turn by Vadim Gazi.

He powerlessly failed near her, but on his proceeding gentle caress she understood with pleasure, though with small fear that he isn’t indifferent to her!

From the neighboring room the groans of Rudd and Milene reached. Al and Natalie amicably burst out laughing.

” Oh yeah! Emotions shouldn’t be constrained!” she funnily rapped out and again encountered Al’s hot kiss. “After all don’t you consider the sex as a defect?” She, having risen glanced in his blue eyes.

“A defect is a pleasure without a shame!” he said with an arrangement.

“Cool!” Natalie clapped the hands. She admiringly inclined over him, kissing his eyes, cheeks, a sensual mouth gently. Al felt a ticklish touch of her magnificent hair, a wave spread over his face. He rose and tumbled her down, continuing to kiss. They continued the coition, but already in a more measured, delightful rhythm! She let out the plaintive groans, which were making him crazy. He rhythmically moved the hips and both of them as if devoured each other with the studying looks! After the next love agony, he leaned back on the pillows, without tearing off a loving look from her. Then, having propped up one hand the face, he continued by other hand light touches, as if being afraid to cause the pain to her. They exchanged a gentle kiss.

“There’s no end to it!” she burst out laughing. He hardly came off her and sat down on bed, having deeply sighed.

“When shall we meet?” he asked, slowly getting dressed.

“Whenever you want,” she simply answered.

Having got dressed, he slipped in the hall and opened the door. She slightly shuddered on a clang of the shut door and, having curled up, plunged into the thoughts, slightly smiling.



The Soldier’s Fortune

Once they rushed into the village where the armed Taliban sat down. They were committed to cleanse each house. Dan with the group and the lieutenant Stanley approached a poor hut. “Get, get out the house immediately!” cried out Stanley. An old man with a turban ran out straight on the lieutenant. Stanley was shouting without ceasing and shot the poor man rather by inertia. A wildly shouting wife and, incessantly shouting kids ran out after the old man.

Dan was stupefied. “What you…, what are you doing, man?” he questioned incessantly, addressing to Stanley. He was swearing wildly splashing his saliva. They quickly rounded the house. Dan looked back and saw how all family was inclined over the unfortunate. However, the woman (his wife or daughter is unclear!) caught them up and, having seized Stanley by breasts stridently shouted. It wasn’t necessary the translator to understand the sense of her words: she damned all Yankees, then, spat in the lieutenant face! Shocked Stanley wasn’t even wiped. They went further as the beaten dogs.

Then, such things happened more than once. And once, they in an emphasis shot the young man, who having armed with a pitchfork didn’t let them in a home. It appeared that he just married, and didn’t want to allow the infidels to get in a bedroom where his wife was sleeping! Dan remembered Ginny and imagined how he would feel if the armed people get into his house. He understood that he’s turning into the killing machine, but at the same time realized that it was the beginning of the end!


Violence! A nasty word and causing a negative feeling! It is blamed by all religions and secular legislations! They judge for it, put in prisons and deprive of life! But very few people think of violence over themselves! Occasionally it accompanies  all our life!

Don’t we rape ourselves going to work daily which we do not love, living with people to which our feelings cooled down long ago, telling words which we do not want to tell! How long it is possible to mock ourselves?! Tyrants over others are caught and stop sufferings of people! We not in forces to stop these infinite tortures over ourselves and we doom ourselves to incurable diseases and premature death!


How to escape from this prison and to stop tortures? The main character of the movie, The Shawshank Redemption floated through a sewer pipe of five football fields to avoid prison! But before it he thought of the plan of escape during the whole 20 years!


We can spend 20 years for the inert life complete of disgusting daily repetitions, and we can break to new life!


Where to begin with? Can you just listen to yourself in the beginning? When did you do it last time? To remove TV, radio, the Internet, mobile, they so inconsiderately intruded in our existence, having made us of their pathetic slaves! To hear yourself, your unique entity! All our life we were taught to respect and love others, but not ourselves!  They molded bricks from us which are so easy for controlling.

Maybe we will hear ourselves, having spent for it not 20 years, but only 20 minutes, hour, 5 hours, the whole day? So don’t hesitate buddy, get ready for the jump!